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The Everywhen at the Mojave

Published on May 24, 2021

Somewhere kinda between California City, California and Edwards Air Force Base.

It’s on roads that the G overlords will tell you are real and the voice from your phone tells you to take. Truth be told, it is somehow so much more convenient than the legends of dry Nevada lake beds that it almost feels like cheating, while also somehow being just as much of a logistical pain in the ass.

When I first heard our permit was denied, I was foaming in my reptilian brain. I don’t know the last time that I've read hundreds of pages of legalese government documents with so much fury and fervor, but that first week was a record setter for sure. Public Lands are Public Lands, dammit! Beautifully though -- there were so many people working in the pro (pronounced prah) and we had countless alternate site options.

Enter the Mojave Site. Wait, it’s close to town? Psh screw that, you need to deal with your forgotten missing items! Roads? You mean there are existing roads? We CaN’t FiT iN yOuR mOLds MaAaAaAnN!! So, I made the four hour trip out to confirm my skepticism and worst preconceived notions so that I could dig my heels in with unwavering confidence. Unfortunately, I met the property owner. Super mellow dude with just the right amount of anarchy and good will. He gave me and Oz a tour of the 300+acre property, walked us up the peaks overlooking the undeniable home of the Electric Universe, sacrificed to the gods, standard festival organizer stuff.